“If evil be spoken of you and it be true, correct yourself, if it be a lie, laugh at it.” Epictetus
Some things I have learned thusly: Not everyone will like you and I cannot take myself too seriously. I have (and still do) face criticism. I have found that the best way to stay out of controversy is to completely avoid it. If one does not do anything negative, then when we find ourselves amongst gossip and chaos, we can rest easy and simply laugh it off knowing that it is baseless and completely unfounded. I am indeed overly happy and all over the place, but I am harmless! I have received reminders of myself from 10 years ago and I must say, it’s COMPLETELY embarrassing! I must call myself out (aside from things done to me) I have been a thief, a liar, a cheat, an addict and alcoholic, completely out of control; this hardly touches the surface. If you are any of these things; do not count yourself out and feel damaged beyond repair. There is always hope; I know but little, I do, however, I know something about and believe in humanity and goodness. Trust that I am well versed on current events, much of my life revolves around them. I am well aware of all of the negativity and atrocities in the world; many of which (and I am EXTREMELY sad about) involve people I love. If I do not involve myself, I can laugh off negativity and realize it is not ME, but the other party. I have spent too much of my life spent at the whim of others; we choose this, no person has control unless permission is granted. One need not waste needless energy on worry of other’s thoughts about them, but rather remain secure with themselves.
I have been VERY busy doing things for different organizations, mainly mental and physical health. At the gym this morning, I saw a senior citizen fitness class. A man showed me how he was walking better with a cane. These things made me elated. A man next to me was lifting heavy weights, but I couldn’t help but be enamored by people with canes and walkers working out, walking slowly in a circle in an adjoining room. A friend told me of a young man with a prosthetic leg on a swim team a few months ago..another friend exercises despite having arthritis. Things are not just physical, I know for myself and MANY people, it’s VERY hard to do anything,even the mundane. Or see light when all you want to do is disappear into the black. The people that go to the gym when they do not need to, who participate in life when it’s unfathomable; they are the ones who give me strength and hope. Personally.
Mental: Be the best YOU. Not compared to social constructs or what you see and read and feel you “should” be. An example: one has the notion you can never be too rich or too skinny. They keep losing weight; it is never enough, eventually they end up in the hospital psych ward; the illusion almost killed them. Then they realize they have the world at their fingertips financially, but all the money in the world cannot buy happiness; disillusioned, they shirk life. Happiness is not tangible; no weight,no chemical, no money can replace it. Be happy with you, not compared to others.
Physical: Just do it! Everyone has to start at point A. You should not be embarassed. No person has the power to make you feel that way. No one starts out wonderful,don’t feel like you should. Do it for your heart, your metabolic system, your lungs, your balance, your movement, your cardiovascular system…your health… not so you look good in gym clothes or have the biggest muscles.
Social: Sometimes we just have to do things because we know they’re right, although we may not WANT to. Doing the right things, in society, is not always easy (at all) when we are pulled in the opposite direction (by ourselves and others). But it most often will simply feel better!
You all rock, yes you! You all inspire me and motivate me everyday; your encouragement is awesome. And I can imagine, if you guys do it for ME who else you rub off on. Imagine if we all lifted each other up, what an incredible world this would be. No competition about how cool you are, how good you look, what you have,etc; just people loving and being there for others! Keep putting out positive energy to the world, it makes a difference!
Mental: When you wake up tell yourself it’s going to be a good day; if things go awry…take a moment then hit reboot! You always have the ability to change your mindset; any time, place, etc. Up to you 🙂
Physical: Avoid putting anyone down because they are not as physically “good” as you. When I was first disabled, I didn’t go out in public for a year and a half!! because I had seen my whole life the disdain with which people with disabilities, not “good looking” enough, physical defects, etc. were treated. This scared me… how I might be treated; I was physically immobile, yet was the exact same person. Sometimes people fail to look beyond the physical and miss the true individual; often failing to see wonderous people because they don’t see beyond the external.
Social : Be good to each other, comparisons stink. Often, we find ourselves in a contest with society as to who is “better”. Better looking, better car, clothes, behaved,etc.,etc.When really you should compete with no one but yourself. Strive to be the best you you can be; not the best “them”