While talking to a friend last night, I made some comments on judgement, for I am constantly faced with such. I do not look for sympathy nor seek criticism of those who do so; they are simply acting as they’ve been taught and have a lifetime’s worth of societal programming in their psyche. Judge lest not ye be judged; I cannot condemn another for their lack of empathy, hate, and fear. It has increasingly dawned on me that people fear that which is different and treat others with a sense of condemnation if the are such. The elderly are judged as senile and helpless, the mentally ill as crazy and violent, the physically disabled as weak, the mentally challenged as lesser than, addicts and alcoholics as worthless, etc. Those who would sit in a position of judgement clearly have not been exposed to these things or are in complete denial of there existence in the world. My friends and family deal with me and my disabilities on a constant basis, are kind, and do not judge. In turn, this has taught them to have a greater awareness of others, act with compassion, (hopefully) be more kind to themselves, and be grateful for what they possess (if it’s not much, they are alive).
Whether old, overweight, disabled, etc. each man and woman is a human being first and not defined by labels unless they allow it. Judgement is inevitable; unless you are perfect (and no one is perfect) and you will at be faced with criticism at some point. It is a choice, however, as to whether you let this truly affect your psyche. Only the individual of whom we speak has the ultimate say of their sense of worth and level of self-esteem. One cannot be affected unless they allow the negativity to sway their way of thinking. No man, woman, or child has the power to say how one is; they are simply people like the rest of us. Without permission, words and stares cannot affect anyone; they cannot make one feel angry or hurt unless allowed to do so. I have had multiple judgments come my way this week; I will not let them affect me. I have a high sense of self-worth and no amount of these will change that. If these critiques are done out of love, I will pay attention, however, if they are simply hate directed my way, I will pay them no mind. I realize the individual is hurt and I will not, in turn, judge them, too.