I have found it to be somewhat of juxtaposition that to win the fight, I must surrender. There is much I must surrender to and accept; my brain and my body. It isn’t until I can accept myself, flaws and all, that I am whole. No one is perfect; definitely not I!! Even with an abundance of flaws, people are wonderful! I have many friends who feel “less than” compared to “normal” people. To this I say, they simply have different battles; what is “normal”, anyway? They are simply people (me, too) who happen to have problems, but, then, so does everyone. When we view similarities, as opposed to differences, our attitude becomes one of inclusion rather than a “them versus me” mentality. I do not have my head in the clouds; I realize there is much pain and sorrow in this world and many reasons to place a barrier between you and those you feel are different, however, when we accept ourselves, it’s easier to accept those we see as different.
Like I said, I have myriad of peers who feel different and ostracized. They are not different, they are part of the human whole; they may be individuals, but they are just as much a part of humanity as anyone else. Whatever they feel; they are part of. Feelings are not facts; a lesson I take to heart. I spent much of my life ruminating on what people thought and felt about me, how they acted towards me; replaying every moment in my head. Fact of the matter is, we cannot control other people; I have no idea why someone acts a certain way (maybe they, themselves, are having a bad day and/or distracted). I have to realize that the world doesn’t revolve around me and I am not so powerful as to control my surroundings. Once I accept my lot in life; things work out much more smoothly than if I scrap and struggle. I continue to fight, yet I have stopped fighting. Have fun figuring that out!